Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Of Catches, Kibbutzes, and Covenants

Well, you're there. Your feet are on the ground in the Holy Land. And I'd just like to review a few things with you before you really get started.

Let's talk about men. You know...those swarthy, handsome types who live right where you are...

If his name is Mohammad Al-Anything, run.
If you're watching a soccer match with him, and his idea of trash talking is, "Death to the Infidel!" run.
If he thinks you look totes presh in a burqa, run.

But to be fair...
If he wails at walls, run.
If he wears a box on his head, run.
If he thinks he's going to heaven because Abraham is Great Grandpa, oy vey, run!

And while we're on this subject...
We'd really rather you don't come home having married a dispensational Zionist named Goldblatt. Actually, we'd really rather you don't marry a dispensational Zionist named Smith or Jones, either.  Just stay away from romantic flings with dispensational Zionists, mmmkay?

You are not to come back wearing a kerchief and telling me you're going to move to a kibbutz.
You want exotic?
Try walking on the water.
Or stick an umbrella in your matzoh ball soup.

But seriously...

You're in a spiritually volatile place.
Remember what Dad's been talking about here: wisdom crying aloud in the market.
When you get to a real outdoor market, and your senses are barraged with all kinds of sights and sounds and enticements, remember how important it is to hold on to your passport and your good sense and to think clearly.

And as you begin to move into the international marketplace of ideas, those same principles hold true.
Listen for Wisdom's voice and follow her.
Hold on to your heavenly passport. It reminds you where your true citizenship lies.
Hold on to the good sense of your Covenant and think clearly.
And the secret to that?
How ironic that, as you begin your adventure in the Land of the Sh'ma, it's all right there.
Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart,
ALL your soul,
ALL your might.

Apply sound, not sloppy, theology.
The only Favored Nation status God has ever granted is to His Church,
not to some tiny geopolitical nation off the Mediterranean,
not to some 21st Century dudes who have Abraham's nose or Sarah's curly hair.

You're in a politically volatile place.
Love the Palestinians, as well as the Jews.
Remember that you have more fellowship with a Palestinian believer than you do with a Jewish non-believer.
Remember that all men, regardless of ethnic origin, must come to the Father through the Son.

Don't get involved in the land grab or take up anyone's offense. Don't seize that dog by the ears.
And remember that there are two sides to every story. One man seems right...until another comes along and states his case.

Remember that you are a Covenant woman.
Be prepared to give an answer for the hope that is in you,
to the Jew, the Palestinian, and the alien.

And have fun.
Love, Mom

Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. Deuteronomy 6:4-6

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